2-legit

I am awesome. The mess in my apartment is now shovelable, I just charged $5.64 at Starbucks to my credit card, and I still have a hickey from my Friday night drunken random hook-up.

Facebook is ruining the anonymity of the random hook-up. In a society that has trained us that "I'll call you" has the sincerity of a passing "Hi, how are you," I did not expect future contact with my drunken one night stand. I was proud of my own lasciviousness, perfectly content to stagger out the door while he slept, hail a cab and get home in time to puke some more. I didn't leave my number or even my broken $2 earring. I figured I was in for some gentle teasing from the mutual friend who, only a few hours earlier, was too distracted to actually introduce us in the first place. But that would be the end of it and I could go on patting myself on the back for letting go and allowing myself a rare indiscretion. Then my indiscretion found me on Facebook, sent me a message making sure I got home ok and apologizing for his half of the drunkenness. No, no, no! Where's the lasciviousness in that? Why legitimize one of my too-few acts of youthful freedom?
But now, thank you Modern Technology, he is human and has a last name and some sense of legitimacy. When I see Mutual Friend tomorrow, I can't just laugh it off. "Ha ha! Yeah, I don't know what happened! Ha ha! So drunk! Ha ha!" Because now there is a person with feelings and, if junior high taught me nothing else, anything said to a Mutual Friend can come back to bite me in the ass.
Birdy thinks I should marry the guy so we have to tell the story of "how we met." Thank you, Birdy.

Do you think there is a prize somewhere for over-analysis?