Toying with God

Today on BBC.com, there is an article on the "faith-based toys" soon to be sold at Walmart. They're bible story action figures. I hope parents realize that it'll be a matter of hours before Spiderman, Optimus Prime, and G.I. Joe totally kick the crap out of Peter, Paul, and Darth Vadar in the epic battle of Dakota and Corey's backyard. Two days later, baby brother Logan will be rushed to the emergency room with Moses's staff lodged up his nose or choking on the disembodied head of Jesus. Another week or so and Paul will be riding My Little Pony home from work to greet his wife, Barbie, and their children, Baby Jesus and a Cabbage Patch Kid. I'm just saying...

And for the girls? P31 dolls, "based on the biblical teaching of Proverbs 31." Correct me if I'm wrong, those of you with more bible learnin' than me, but Proverbs 31 seems very "Woman, get in the kitchen!" And the fact that these dolls come "with an accessory kit, containing a Bible lesson (based on Proverbs 31:20), two cookie-cutters, a cookie recipe, and a list of exciting activities," makes me wonder if all of these "exciting activities" are domestic training. Doesn't bode well for the Future Feminists of America.