Today was not the sort of day I like to have. Yesterday was nice and involved lots of quality time with NBF, but then today was one for that dark nasty swamp-monster of self-hate and self-doubt. He was a very destructive monster, too, feeding off all the things I knew I should be doing while I sat in bed being useless. Weren't we going to avoid the whole depression thing this go-round of school? Apparently the swamp monster did not get the memo. Or maybe he can't read and is too embarrassed to tell anybody. Poor swamp monster. After all, he's born of a sad heart. That's why I can't get rid of him. All my tools are head tools. I am very good with the head tools. But heart tools, not so much. My heart is an autistic child, being beaten by a swamp monster, no less. Poor autistic child. 
I imagine my innards are going through the scene from Frankenstien where the monster drowns the little girl, not out of maliciousness, but out of misunderstanding.Thank goodness for warm loving dogs and warm loving friends who even love me when I'm crying and talking about monsters.
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1 comment:
i shall send thee a monster or 2. you set them on a chair across the room and tell them exactly what you think of their crappy scheme to destroy you.
and then you take a zoloft & 2 extra strength tylenol and go do laps around k-mart. don't take the monsters with you. they'll make you buy make-up you won't use.
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